I’m on the verge of (another) major move across the Country and for some reason, this time I am running into something that has been pretty much a non-factor for a long time for me…
When I was 23 I fearlessly moved from Texas to Atlanta. It was my first time moving into my own apartment and I moved to a different state, on my own, with no friends or family there. Fearlessly. It all happened in a matter of literally weeks… I identified that that was were I wanted to be, found places I thought I would like to work, applied for jobs, and found prospective apartments close by. I said “I’m moving in April” before really even knowing it would happened. I believed it and had everything packed and ready to go before even getting a call for an interview. All of this happened in the midst of my Mom moving and I told her “Don’t get a room for me… I wont be here” And she reluctantly agreed to move without a room for me without knowing for sure I would be gone. It actually happened! I got a call for an interview, did a bunch of driving back and forth(ugh!), and moved April 17th into one of the apartments I’d put on my wish list.
It was so simple.
Now, 5 years have passed. I’ve lived in 3 different states alone and I’ve learned a lot about the way things go. I’ve had my share of troubles and hard times so this time I’m a lot more… how can I say it? Aware. I know what could go wrong.
It’s not so easy or simple this time.
When I was about 15 or 16 I took gymnastics before trying out for my High-schools cheer-leading team… I was so… AWARE and afraid. The coach was saying “jump up, run, flip backwards, then forward, roll, twist, jump, and land in a split”… and I’m like “But Why?!” Lol. He said something to me that has stuck. He told me to look around… Most of the people taking the class were either toddlers or had been there since toddler age… He said that when you aren’t aware of the danger you’re more willing to run out and jump and try whatever is thrown your way. You don’t know what could go wrong so the fear isn’t there.
I don’t know about you guys but I’m praying and pushing myself to have that same child-like, blind faith. I’m pushing myself as we speak towards my dreams THROUGH my fears. If you are experienced at things sometimes common sense or practical thinking comes in and tells you that something isn’t possible. But if you know that you know that you know that you are supposed to be somewhere in your life and you have to battle with others or even yourself with “it just doesn’t make any sense” “how will it happen” etc, then you need to go to battle! Talk yourself through it and get in line with your purpose. Your faith will erase the fear.
Faith isn’t practical. It wont always make sense. God is the “Who” and when you know “Who” is in control you don’t always have to worry about the “How.” Just do your part and he’ll do his!
There is a cure! And it’s within you…
Now Faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance of what we do not see. (Hebrews 11:1)